Virgins in the Wetlands Walk for DD returning hasher from China
Dear Hashers,
We are going to be a large number at the Hash this Saturday - lots of new recruits from last night at The Brit Club. It’s a welcome back DD Down Down Hash. DD if you remember was in China for weeks and weeks promoting Indian pop culture The cool dude’s back lookin’ hotter than ever and we’re going to his favourite spot in the Wetlands…Need I say more? Be there in front of ITC Sonar Bangla Hotel gates. Wear sneakers and long socks. We’ll be walking for an hour and then drinking beers in the circle. We’ll drink to the Brits and Americans who are off this morning to a weekend in Phuket!
Just bring Rs. 100.
On on,
Latecummer Neela 9830014934
P.S. The attachment is what I’d like to do to Hare Stalker Ashish if he goofs up!
Hash Trash
On 28th May, 2005 we were sweating it out in the wetlands. We were 16 in all and had a wonderful hash.
2 Hares: Stalker Ashish and Sex Guru Saw.
6 Virgins: Chef Vikas of Flury's, Kesivan Naidoo of S. Africa, Rono, Susmit, Ambar, Barry
1 Acting GM: Willy Wanker Shaun
1 Acting RA: Hungry Kya Alain
1 Dray: Late Cummer
1 Moth: La La Christyne
1 Returnee: DD
2 Front Running Bastards: Butterworth, Topsurd Chintu
1 Short Cutting: Suzie
All the cars at the ITC insisted on heading to the wetlands and Ambar's car of virgin hashers all got lost and the convoy had to wait for them. Hare Stalker was waiting on the main road to drive us to the parking spot at the circle. Sex Guru was waiting with returning hasher DD from China to start off the trail.
We followed the water trails on the edge of the ditches, past the water hyacinths and into the wetland area. We had to constantly make way for cows and other cattle. The Hares had us looking for the trails over the horizon and there were so many circles and checkbacks and lost trails that we were walking around for more than an hour. It was a balmy evening but we were sweaty by the end of the trail. Ashish thought the salt lakes looked like the sea / backwaters in Puri!
Willy Wanker Shaun led the circle and all the newcomers were given down downs. The fashion offenders were given down downs as were the mobile phone offenders. The Hash Cash was collected by yours truly and you may have noticed me in my new clothes at the Brit Club ;-D
On on to the next hash.
Late cummer Neela
9830014934
Some hash Fan mail from Patricia the Can Can dancer:
Dear Hash friends,
Im so happy to know all of you ... I come back to Kolkata in july until
middle of august 2005 and, of course, I want absolutely to continue to walk
near detritus and everything like that !!!
For the moment, Im with my french friend Isabelle in the marvellous indian
moutains. Last week in Sikkim, this week in Darjeeling and next week (for 2
weeks) in Darhamsala.
Wonderful temperature, wonderful weather, wonderful country and ...
wonderful people. I met and spoke with a lot of people from Kolkata and
perhaps, i propose you new members for Hash Club when I come back in July !
I wish for everybody the best in life (only love it's enough...) and see
you again in july
Take care and warmest regards
Patricia
Wetlands Jinxed Hash
The Hash was totally jinxed ! No one knew for certain that the Hash run was planned for May 21 for the Wetlands and Nipples (Asish) better known as the Stalker was to be haring. None of us got the mail from Duck Suck saying it was at ITC Sonar Bangla until the mail was sent on Saturday morning. After frantic smses from the Stalker Ashish and from yours truly, Late Cummer, 5 of us did turn up at the gates of ITC Sheraton.
There was the French contingent– cancan dancing Patricia and Nicolas of the French Connection whom Bill had managed to convince to come on Thursday at the British Club. Ashish had convinced his Chaddi (Indian briefs (remember those strange garments at the Nash Hash)Buddy Nitin who had also joined us on Thursday at the British Club to come hare with him as Virgin Hasher probably after some of that Jamaican Rum and Ginger Beer cocktail smuggled in by Max for her farewell… Nicolas and Nitin were the only two waiting patiently for the rest of us namely Late Cummer Neela, with Pat getting a lift there with Willy Wanker Shaun from The Park. We waited till about 4:15 for other hashers like Lucky and the Boys who sent no news whether they were coming or not. Pants Down Pammi had already said he couldn’t come and neither could Chintu and Christyne who were auditioning (for Mira Nair’s film Namesake being shot in Calcutta) after being chosen at The British Club, venue for the casting, the previous Thursday. Those two were paid Rs.1000 each for strutting their stuff the next morning, Sunday. Topsurd Chintu gets his name in the credits as Anil, the hot dancer at the Asian underground nightclub in America for coming on on on to another hot babe on the dance floor. Watch out Sarah, he’ll be asking for a visa next to go to Hollywood, well actually to Hawaii for his honeymoon next year...
Well to come back to the surly gates of ITC where Patricia was bemoaning the fact that you can’t smoke in public places and cafes in India and that she can rarely enjoy a cigarette with a good cup of coffee so essential to the bien etre of the French, I wondered whether we had to send smoke signals to the Hares in the Wetlands as there was no network out there and we weren’t clear where we had to go to meet them.
There’s a long stretch of road to the left of the marble sheds and we seemed to be going down the road on on on for miles while keeping a look out for the lost hares. By then Shaun and I were getting fed up with Stalker Ashish as the line kept getting cut off and we needed to know whether we’d passed his Bridge Over the River Kya? The convoy of 3 cars decided to turn back because Shaun and I both remembered passing a black and white bridge that was being mentioned (of course it wasn’t black and white- that was the wooden footbridge) and Ashish, Carl and Siddiqui had to drive back in Stalker’s red car in order to find us. The attachment is what we must have looked like and it’s what I’d have liked to do to the Stalker.
By then it was nearly quarter to five and we decided that with Ashish there the Hash was jinxed. We decided not to have the hash but to have a beer and keep the trail for the next Saturday. We went back to the point where the hash was to start and I would have never found it even though I’ve been to the wetlands before. Then Ashish decided that the circle wasn’t at the starting point and we had to double back to a clearing where there was a litter of pigs and form a circle with the cars. An icebox full of beer, cold drinks and ice was in Ashish’s car. We all quenched our thirst then and decided that the hash run would be better left for another day in case the grey skies were an indication of rain. It’s lucky we didn’t set off on a trail cos we would have been wandering around the wetlands literally and figuratively in the dark!
Now I hear that Bean Town, Molester and co. are off to phuket for a junket. So they may still miss the Hash next Saturday. Can’t postpone it till the Saturday after as Stalker’s brain cells won’t remember the trail after two weeks.
So see you there this Saturday 28th May, 2005 at 4 p.m. sharp at the ITC gate and everyone in town better be there! If you haven’t already sent in your Rs.5000 for the Nash Hash in Mysore better do so as it’s the last Nash Hash we’ll have with the terrible trio Bill, Sarah and Molester!! And if you still don’t have a clue This year Nash Hash will occur at Mysore, courtesy of Bangalore HHH. Details available at this link:
www.bangalorehash.com/subpages/nash_hash.html
On on on,
Late Cummer Neela
RUGBY NOT RUN
Quite a few Hashers were at the Brit Club last night, and over a few pints of the good stuff (when’s the real stuff going to flow?), abandoned the idea of hashing this Saturday as it’s the ‘Jungle Crows Rugby Festival’ at the East Bengal Ground on the Maidan.
There’s John’s Farewell Ten “Scots Crusaders” v/s Christophe’s Ten “French Fire” & Gary’s Ten “English Bulls” v/s Sanjay’s Ten “India Cyclone” and a number of other teams. Kick-off at 4.00 p.m. Got a fixture off John that says there’ll be a band, entertainment, etc. etc.
The next Hash run is planned for May 21 and Nipples (Asish) will be haring.
Lets hear it for the Crows
Duck Suck
